I had changed clothes three times. I just couldn't make up my mind how I wanted him to see me for the first time. I had surely lost my mind this time because not only had I not seen him face to face yet, but we had already exchanged I love you's and deep down I knew we both meant it. It had been the most unexpected turn of events since my chaotic romantic career began.
For fifty nine days, we had talked on the phone just laughing and connecting deeply with one another. Between phone calls, we were texting and sending pictures. It was like I had met another part of me and although we were both in relationships, I knew I needed more of him.
Ending the relationship that I was in became so easy the night I rolled up on him with another girl; who he ended up marrying. I was relieved that I wouldn't have to be the bad guy. It was the easiest breakup ever, and I was so grateful that I would never have to confess that in the time he had been putting me on the backburner, I had fallen in love with someone else over the telephone.
It was 2013, but he gave me late night BET Midnight Love vibes from my high school days from 2004-2006. He gave meaning to all the love songs that I couldn't attribute to anyone during the time they had just been released. I finally had someone in my life who I felt could understand my hopes and dreams; you know...someone who really spoke my language. It was the sweetest time I had ever known.
It was almost time for us to see each other face to face for the first time, and Lord I was nervous! I came up with a plan with my sister. I needed her to run interference so she could check him out and let me know if he looked like his pictures. She had agreed to walk him in and then I would enter once he was settled. I had it all planned out. I would walk in and smile shyly. I would embrace him for the first time and inhale his scent, at least I hoped he would have a nice cologne because I had always loved a good smelling man.
The plan was all set and after hours of waiting for him, the plan was finally in motion.
I stood there absolutely sure that I had chosen the perfect outfit "first meeting" outfit. I wore a simple red pencil skirt with a black graphic t-shirt since our first conversation was about my love of graphic tees, a denim vest with five inch leopard peep toe wedge heels. I was able to spot him through the window and while I knew there was a plan, I just had to make a move. The man I had fallen in love with over the phone was finally breathing the same air that I was.
My heart was pounding. I could hear my thoughts much louder that than the music that was blasting moments ago. Now it all of a sudden sounded like a whisper underneath my anxious thoughts. My ears had never worked so well. My inhale and exhale became audible. My right leg began to jump and shake vigorously. I felt like a puppy eager to greet its owner. If I had a tail, it would have started wagging right then and there. I resisted the urge to make basketball moves in the open space. I just didn't know what to do with my body.
"The man who God created just for me could be on the other side of that door. This man could be my beauty for ashes." I remember thinking.
So I abandoned the plan. I walked out the door and right into his arms. He smelled like a sexy piece of heaven. You know, if heaven has a sexy department. That's what I imagined it would smell like. He looked tired from the ride, but delightful. His smile was genuine. He liked me. I could tell. He was new to me, yet familiar; like we often met in my dreams.
He was home.